New Year 2009

New Year is here again. 2008 will be past and soon 2009 will be here.

We all have our share of good and bad things that happened in 2008 and we are all eagerly looking forward to the New Year with great hopes.

The year 2008 will always be remembered for the Mumbai terrorist attacks. Now as the New Year begins, India is into intense discussions with Pakistan on how to wipe out terrorism right from its roots.

On the global front, the “great” economic recession happened casting its dark shadow over the whole world. We are still in its dark shadow waiting desperately for it to move away from our horizon. The year 2009 will be crucial in this respect. The whole world is looking up to Obama to see how the new president of the US is planning to turn around the economy.

What was the best thing to happen to me in 2008? Well, the authorities decided to fill up the craters on the roads, which were the trademark of the Airport road. I have personally visited the depths of one of these craters. What do I look forward to in 2009? I hope the street light along the road will open their eyes, taking us back from the time when stars and the moon guided travelers.

I guess Bangalore has a one-hour relaxation on late night parties although it does not seem to be good idea to be on the road at that time. I am sure people haven’t forgotten how an unruly crowd molested a newly wed in front of a hotel in Delhi after a party. Both censored and uncensored versions of the incident did their rounds in the media, adding injury to the insult. Looks like the police will be really busy this New Year.

Indo-Pak war

Any discussion on Indo-Pak war brings to my mind yellowish old newspapers covering the windows of our quarters in the Sainik School campus. I was not even born at the time of the 1971 war, but the windows covered with old newspapers always reminded us of the war. The aerial view of the lit up campus would have given an impression of a defence establishment. Our parents explained that the windows were covered to avoid air attacks. Even after several rounds of maintenance work, the newspapers on the windows remained.

Among war stories, we have also heard a lot of stories about the First World War, in which some of our relatives also took part. They were in the French army. I have heard many sad stories about their children orphaned by the war after the French hospital was attacked.

So far, an India-Pak war may have been fought by soldiers somewhere far away. Most of us only read in newspapers about our soldiers dying in the border. What would be the magnitude of another war between the two countries? Can we imagine covering up our windows and living in fear of air attacks?

Lack luster Christmas for Bangalore sans Santa

Looks like Bangalore will have a really quiet Christmas this year. There is no festival spirit on the occasion this year. Even though we don’t celebrate Christmas, we could simply feel it in the air. This time we never realized it was Christmas but for the holiday. It just felt like another holiday on the calendar, sans cheer. I didn’t even see stars lit outside houses.

Blame it on the terrorist attacks in Mumbai or the economic slowdown, it feels really empty. People simply don’t seem to be in a mood to celebrate. Even though malls have additional security, people generally seem to want to avoid crowded places. The same goes with cinema theatres.

Some people are even worried about going to churches. It’s like any place could be the next target. What is confusing me is that this is not the first time that India has witnessed violence. It has happened many times before. But never have people reacted this way.

It could be that people are unable to digest the fact that a handful of people from a neighbouring country could simply walk in and cause terror attacks of this magnitude. It could also be that people realized that terrorism can affect all classes. It is no longer something that affected local markets frequented by the lower and middle classes.

According to newspapers, many hotels have got rid of Santa as they don’t feel like celebrating. They also said that underpaid Santa was also not willing to spread cheer. We will miss Santa this year!

The story about Lord Ram and the frog

I was really touched by this short, I must say very short story related to Ramayana about Lord Ram and a frog. Ram and his brother Lakshman reached a stream and were thirsty. They went towards the stream to quench their thirst. Ram struck his arrow into the ground near the stream and went to drink water. When Ram was back, he pulled out the arrow from the ground. He was astonished to find blood on the tip of his arrow. He looked down and saw a small frog. His arrow had pierced the frog, pinning it to the ground. Ram was sad. He asked the frog, “Why didn’t you cry out when the arrow pierced you?” The frog replied, “Whenever someone tries to harm me I cry out, “Ram, save me! When Ram himself pierces me with his arrow to whom can I cry out for help?”

The story has a deeper meaning into it. What could be worse? It always brings to my mind little children abused by adults. They are so innocent and trusting and they somehow think adults will protect them, especially their parents. In India we always read about parents killing the children as part of a mass suicide. Newspapers provided gory details of a mother strangling her 5-year-old daughter before committing suicide. There is another mother who threw her little ones into the river. I remember a spine chilling account by a railway engine driver, who saw a mother pushing her struggling little children in front of the train. He witnessed the helplessness and fear in the eyes of those little children who were crushed under the train.

My children were disturbed by such detailed accounts in newspapers. They asked, “Why do parents kill their children?” I said, “Parents, especially mothers think of a child as an extension of themselves. May be they think their children will suffer after their death”. But then there is no justification for taking an innocent child’s life. My son said, “Even if the parents want to die, why can’t they just let the children live. They will live some how.” I realized that children were following up with such incidents in newspapers. They are simply unable to digest the idea of parents killing their own children.

While parents are adults and make the decision themselves, the hapless children have no one to turn for help when parents turn attackers. Their little lives get put out by the same hands that nurtured them. For those children who survive, it will be a trauma that lasts a lifetime.

Forgive, but never forget rudeness

Just like kindness touches our hearts, rudeness also affects us, though we would like to be immune. For some people rudeness is second nature, for some it is just exploiting another person’s helplessness or taking advantage of their position.

All of us would have come across rude bus conductors, auto rickshaw drivers and policemen in our day-to-day lives. We may also end up with rude neighbours. I thank my stars for my wonderful neighbours. They are such great friends. I wonder what makes people behave rudely. Sure, they can attribute it to extreme stress. But that does not excuse irrational behaviour.

Sometimes I feel tempted to return in the same coin. But then I stop myself thinking I shouldn't stoop so low. I am sure all of us would have at some point of time wondered why some people can’t be civil. What I have learned is that such people can never change themselves. And surely we do not want to experience that again. So the best thing would be to leave them alone. But if they happen to be your relatives or colleagues, it is hard to avoid them.

A rude act can continue to burn you. It simply churns out hatred. I still remember how some people were rude to me in my childhood. It’s so hard for me to forget or forgive. I believe we should forgive them, but never, never forget the experience. You don’t want to be stabbed in the same place again.

A polite word or smile does spread cheer. It’s pure happiness. You simply cannot measure it. The fragrance lingers in your soul. I guess there is a brighter side to rudeness. It makes us cherish the happiness and warmth of politeness and makes us think twice before being rude to others. Remember, you can never take back an unkind word.

Management lessons - learned and unlearned

We learn and unlearn a lot with each organization we leave behind. No one ever gets to learn these management lessons in the IIMs.

1. Keep your eyes and ears open. It’s not a good idea to be the last person to know that your section is closing down. Believe me, gossips are good for health.
2. Nobody is indispensable, not even the boss.
3. Know that boss is always right. He likes it that way. No point in arguing with him. It’s like arguing with a 10-year-old.
4. Don’t ask, “Why are you only asking me about my late comings? Why aren’t you talking about me staying back later than office hours, and many other things I go out of the way to do?” Believe me, office clock starts at 9.00 am and stops at 6.00 pm and works only week days.
5. Is there a dumb boss preventing your growth? It’s time to quit. Most companies are management-friendly. They might prefer the dumb manager over the smart employee. Management does not really want brilliant employees. Too smart employees may be difficult to handle as they don’t easily swallow the management’s ideas.
6. Anything you do out of the way soon becomes part of your duty.
7. If your manager scolds you, put on a blank look on your face. That would deprive him of any sadistic pleasure.
8. Not doing well at the current job? Don’t feel dejected. Everyone has their own inherent qualities. Your may not be suitable for this job. Polar bears are not for Rajasthan. A situation of mismatch in requirement here. There is an employer looking for these qualities and has lots of money to spare too. You only have to find him.
9. Be honest. Employers can simply feel it. Not even harmless things like faking fever. Earn their trust.
10. Know your rights. Don’t allow yourself to be taken for a ride. Complain. Make yourself heard. Crying child gets milk. When you have to prove a point, don’t lose your temper. You will lose your cause too. Simply pretend to be angry. That helps.

Protecting India from terrorism

The question here is not who will bell the cat, but how can we bell the cat. Terrorism sure needs to be destroyed from its roots, which are of course is in Pakistan. Many people who spoke to the media during the Mumbai attacks mentioned “War”. It may sound good if it is just an empty threat to Pakistan. If it helps frighten Pakistan president Asif Ali Zardari, fine. More than that, I am not too sure. Read any literature on war, no one has really benefited. Do we really want to destroy that country? If we have to fight Pakistan to destroy the terrorists, it’s like burning down a house to kill the rats.

There must be other ways to kill the rats. Pakistan surely did all it can to initiate, support, and groom terrorism. Then it grew out of control. Even if he wishes to, Zardari does not seem to have any power to put an end to terrorism. He has no teeth to bite. He does not even seem to have the strength to bark. He may be under threat. From the history of Pakistan we know what has happened of all rulers. Surely he knows their might and cannot displease them even at the cost of incurring the wrath of other countries.

What choice does India really have now? The only option may be to get the support of other powerful nations, which can push Zardari into doing something. That too very soon, while others may still be ready to help. US support sure has shaken Zardari. Banning some terrorist outfit may not help at all. They will soon change the name. What’s there in a name after all?

While India may be helpless about tackling the terrorists in Pak, it sure can do a lot in its own soil. Terrorists are able to infiltrate only because of security lapses. Seal all loopholes! Do not allow the government take the focus away from their inefficiency by blaming Pakistan. All of this again boils down to having a strong government in India. A government whose priority is the security of the nation, rather than the security of their own chair, is the need of the hour.

A new political party and its future

Everyone has their own idea of what an ideal political party should be. The idea of forming such a party with support from like-minded people has crossed many minds. Sounds good. Of course, I too would like to support a good cause.

Power corrupts man
Absolute power corrupts absolutely!

Many of the existing political parties started off like this -- There was a situation, which needed repair. People joined hands to form a political union, which helped them overcome it. Time passed and party saw several leaders. By then, the situation that necessitated the party no longer existed. The urgency was gone. The ideals, which the party stood for perhaps was no longer relevant. People tend to stick to rules and policies, without realizing they too need to adapt to new needs posed by the new situations. The party now becomes ineffective. Absence of any change makes it stale. It becomes just another party.

Founders of many of the existing partners may be turning in their graves, unable to contain what has happened of their parties. Ever wondered what the founders would tell their parties’ new leaders? Food for thought!

How much time would a new party take to reach this stage? While a new party can be useful in the short term, would people who form a party look at its long term implications also? Form a new party or a union if only it will not be adding to the long list of brain-dead political parties.

Bollywood advocates black bands

Our stars on earth are wearing black bands to express their solidarity. They want all Indians to wear black bands too. People can wear black bands and feel that they have done something for their fellow beings and the country. People can light candles too. Is that all India needs now?

With due respect to our Bollywood stars, why do media want “sound” bytes from the stars? Our stars are so good at their work. We really enjoy watching their movies. There it ends. There are very few Bollywood stars who have made any significant contribution to the society, other than wearing bands. If they are ready to take it further from there and try and do something meaningful for the society, hats off to them.

Media should be trying to do something meaningful, such as talking to people who can really make a difference. What’s the next step? What can we do to prevent terrorist attacks? How can we be better prepared? How can we help the victims? Media does have a higher responsibility than trying to snatch away their share of the celebrities’ limelight.

I hope media will stop regurgitating the clichéd “resilience of Mumbai”. They did move on, and quite remarkably. Should they be allowed to be hit just because they bounce back? We have in us the spirit to fight against all odds till the last breath. Even when the limbs of a human being are cut off, he would still try to crawl, until there is the last trace of life in him. It does not mean he should be subjected to such horrors repeatedly, until he cannot go on.

There are many lesser mortals who have braved the terrorists to help others. What about the hotel staff and many others? Media can play an important role by not letting the government forget them.

There is absolutely no reason for Muslims to feel others will suspect them or blame them for belonging to the religion. No one would ever say so. It was an attack on Indians, not any community. All fingers were pointed at the government for its inability to act.

Vote "only" for an eligible candidate

Come elections, the media comes alive with recommendations for the citizens to exercise their highly acclaimed “right to vote”. Celebrities and politicians make the citizens understand that it is a sin to abstain from voting. This is the only way we can participate in democracy. The only way to ensure we have a say in what’s going on in our country. Through our representatives, we rule our country. “By the people, for the people, of the people”. This is nothing short of heaven.

Wake up from the dream! Recollect your experience at the last elections. This is a sample—my experience. We live in a residential layout. We didn’t have water supply. We had tankers supplying water. People in the layout approached the councillor for help. Nothing happened. Later, someone informed us that this person owned many tanker lorries supplying water. Providing regular water supply would of course affect his business.

Another politician promised water. There was an election, I don’t recollect which one (I am not so politics savvy), but he was elected. But no water again. He said, “You didn’t vote for me. I won because of votes by the other layout”. So water flowed in that direction. How did he know for whom we had voted? I thought voting was a confidential affair.

Then came the main elections. We want water! I looked at the list of candidates in our constituency. I thought no one was worth my vote. Then someone said, “The…candidate will give us water”. Of course I had to vote for someone. At the polling booth their representatives were scanning the people who turned up for voting. Can we demand that parties produce candidates who are worth our votes? Is there a way citizens can turn down unworthy candidates?

There needs to be an option where citizens can vote to disqualify a candidate. How about an option to bar the party from next elections if its candidate was disqualified? Wistful thinking! This might perhaps make parties choose a worthy representative. We should not be happy choosing A, B, C or D. If the answer is “None of the above”, that option should also be provided. WE have a duty towards our country. That’s not simply staining our finger.

Politicians want them all

A former prime minister recently registered his anger against the public outcry against politicians. He wanted to know how the country could go forward without politicians. He said politicians were indispensable for the public, who perhaps failed to understand that.

Following the recent terrorist attack on Mumbai, almost every section of the society joined hands in blaming the politicians. Some of the politicians demanded additional security for themselves. An average Indian has many questions to ask. A farmer is indispensable to our country. He sows and reaps the grains that reach our dining table. A bank clerk is indispensable, so is a school teacher. How about the traffic policeman, who braves the scorching sun and freezing winter without adequate protection? How about the army personnel guarding our borders?

If they are indispensable, what makes a politician’s life more important? Why do they consider themselves more eligible for security, which is not provided to the common man? Is it because they are “common”? From whom should they be protected? How much money is actually lost from the exchequer towards security? Do all of them require such high levels of security? Politicians are more equal I guess!

Which politician would be willing to face the enemy forces in a war? Would they order a war if they had to? Would a transport minister be willing to travel in his own fleet of buses? Would he travel by these buses to work every day? If so, he can complain about people using private transport. Would an education minister send his children to vernacular government schools?

The army and police forces are ready to face any danger as part of their duty. But should they necessarily die? Aren’t they human? Don’t they have hopes and dreams like others? They are also husbands, brothers and sons like the others. A precious life should be scarified if only it is absolutely necessary.

Had intelligence done their duty, many lives could have been saved. Politicians have the power to tighten the strings. But what is top priority for them? Winning brownie points for next elections? Is it unfair to demand that politicians give back at least a small percentage of what they take from the common man?

Little ones swear

I had an appointment with the kids' teacher. When I reached the school, kids had just starting going outside the gate. I saw two little girls chatting animatedly. Oh so cute, I thought. They were about 6-years old and had tied their hair in cute little pig tails. When we were closer, I heard what one of the kids just said. She said, "I asked her to f#*k off". I couldn't believe my ears. I looked at my husband in disbelief. "Did you hear that?", I asked. "I cant believe this", I said, " I am sure the kids dont really know what that's supposed to mean!".

Well, my worst experience with kids came in London, where I had been for the book fair. There was a 12 year old boy in the train. He was chatting away on his mobile. He was talking rather loudly for attention. He said, "I am sitting in this f#*king train with some Indian black d#*&s. My jaws dropped. The Indian boys in my team looked at each other. The English gentleman sitting next to us pretended to be deaf. So did the others in the train, while the kid continued with his conversation.

Call it generation gap or lack of descipline, perhaps kids will never stop giving us such surprises.

When thieves raided neighbour’s kitchen

A bunch of thieves broke into our neighbour’s house at midnight. The funny part was that they were all dressed in red underwear. I wondered how they planned the “operation”. Wonder why they chose the outfit!

The couple heard noises at the back door and were shocked to find the thieves in their kitchen. They screamed. Not to mention it scared the thieves. They jumped over the wall of the layout and disappeared into the dark night.

So far, it seems they did the right thing. Anyone would have done the same. It must have been a terrifying experience.

However, the couple did not inform the neighbours or the police. They thought the thieves got away and that there was no point in disturbing the neighbours. The police had a different story to tell next morning.

The thieves did not return to their homes after escaping from their house. They went to another house that night. They threatened the elderly couple in that house and looted the house. They stuffed all the stolen items into a Maruthi van waiting on the road and then took off. They didn’t harm the couple though.

The police said a complaint from them would have alerted the police, who could have easily caught the thieves. Do we realize how our actions can affect others?

Children ask about terrorism

Ever wondered what children would ask about terrorism?
I was surprised at what kids actually wanted to know.
There is no downplaying terrorism. My 12-year-old son and 9-year-old daughter know more about terrorist attacks than any adult in the family. Blame it on media overdose. However, they didn’t seem to be agitated. Or so I thought so until my son asked, "Which profession is not dangerous?" I thought I should be tactful here.

I said, "Look, both your uncle and aunt are army officers. Isn't that a good profession?". Of course they didn't buy it. They asked, “Who are those people who attacked Mumbai?” and exclaimed, “Oh, they are so young!”
I said, “They are terrorists. They attack innocent people.”

Son said, "It's sooo sad.. that two-year-old boy...he lost his parents...sooo sad."
“Why do they do that?”
I try to explain. “Many of them are people, who are deprived in many ways. It is easy for bad people to influence them into doing bad things.”
“What do they do then?”
I said, “They spread terror through such attacks.”
They asked, “And then?”
I don’t have an answer.
Do we?