Reflections.Harsha

Are you really with Anna Hazare?

2011-08-23T21:09:00.000+05:30

This happened some 17 years back. The septic tank of our huge residential complex had to be cleaned. We saw two men standing near the tank filled with human waste. They wore small dhotis and entered the pit. They started pouring the waste outside manually. The whole place was filled with stench from rotten human waste. I closed the windows.

By evening they had finished the work. I saw the man emerging from the pit. His body was completely covered in sh*# and he was pouring water over his body. The rotten smell lingered. Bars of fragrant soap and perfumes wouldn't have been able to chase it away. We wondered how it must be for him to go home to his family smelling like this. This is his job - so they must be used to this...

Later in the evening I overheard my father discussing this with my mother. The poor man was supposed to have been paid Rs.200 and the official in charge of this refused to pay him if he did not offer him a percentage of this as commission or bribe. The man complained to my father. He said, "Sir, nobody will do such dirty work even for a huge sum. We are ready to do it for such a small amount and from that also the 'big' people want to steal". Thinking about the man I wondered if any of us would do that work even for an obscene amount of money. This nameless and faceless man symbolises the dirty face of corruption all of us are ashamed of.

The over whelming support for Anna Hazare is symbolic of the goodness in people. But will that translate into a real battle with corruption? How many of us will actually have the courage to promise that they will not be involved in any act of corruption, how ever small they think the act is - bribing traffic police, RTO officials, ask government officials for favors (?)...

Corporation's sterilization drive for strays paints a gory picture

2011-06-13T22:47:00.022+05:30

Sid

When the corporation guys landed in our street looking for stray dogs, we thought it might actually be a good idea. With many vacant plots in our residential layout, we see a lot of strays around. Tamed by man eons ago, these animals have now settled down with them, incapable of fending for themselves. They have actually been reduced from hunters to scavengers. And their population was exploding.

Whatever the consequences are, babies of any species are adorable. My daughter loves dogs and watched over the new litter of five. They were in varying colors - black, brown and white. She did not trust the corporation guys when they assured her that they would take care of the small dogs and would safely return them to the same location a few days after the sterilization surgery. As NGOs like CUPA were involved, it seemed likely - I thought so.

A few days after the surgery, two of the pups were returned. The poor female looked as tired and sick as any creature, whose ovaries and uterus were ripped off. We thought she was just recovering. But the next day, her entrails were seen hanging out of the wound. We informed CUPA and they sent a vehicle to pick her up. They said the area was covered by another NGO. Two days later they informed us that she had died. The male dog, which was operated simply stopped eating and was found dead another day later.

Sid and Daisy

Only a few days before these pups were seen happily playing together and sleeping in a cuddly bundle. I wish there was some way we could co-exist...

Yet another B'day

2011-04-06T23:23:00.006+05:30

Celebrated yet another B’day on 5 April. As a kid I was unhappy about the fact that my B’day always came during the summer holidays and I never got to wear color dress and distribute sweets to my classmates. And finally when I went to senior classes, my B’day was always during my exams!

Once we wanted to know the exact time of my birth for my horoscope, which is considered an absolute necessity for all arranged marriages in Kerala. My mother said that my late father had written the time in his diary (He passed away a few months before my wedding). So we searched the huge pile of old diaries, which my father had meticulously kept. In the 22 year old yellowing diary’s page for 5 April, my father had written, “Harsha was born at 5.15pm and I became a father”. It’s so hard to imagine him as a 27 year old new father. My mother said that the names were ready even before I was born. I was to be Harsha or Preett.

My father would always narrate this story on almost every B’day. I was born in my mother’s ancestral home in Kerala. It was a new moon day, which is considered inauspicious. My father was at work when he heard the news and rushed home. When he reached my mother’s house, he met my grandfather at the gate. Without much enthusiasm, he said, “It’s a girl”. My father did not have a permanent job at that time and my grandfather might have thought that a girl baby was not the best thing to happen under those circumstances.

That was not all – my father overheard some woman say that the baby may not survive. She said, “Poor Chandran (my father), if only he gets to bring her up”. He was really upset. But he said he was confident that I was healthy. He said, “Your cries nearly shook the roof, and that meant you were healthy, but a little too small”. Usually babies stay with their mother, but my father ensured that I was always with him whenever he was around. His concern for my health resulted in my becoming a little too chubby by around 4 months, which I supposedly maintained for around 7-8 years.

Instead of my father telling this story, I narrate this to my kids on my B’day. Now, at the brink of 40 (just turned 39), it feels nice to look back and go back in time.

The grand mom I never met

2010-07-31T18:11:00.010+05:30

I have never met my father’s parents. His father died when I was 6 months old (I am the only grandchild he ever saw) and his mother died young. We have a black and white photo of my grandparents at home and she was a beautiful and stylish lady considering that she might have died in the late 1950s. In the photo you see here, she is wearing a velvet blouse, which was fashionable those days - so my father told me. She was not just a photo on the wall for us. She was ‘Achamma’ and we knew her so well through this photo and a lot of stories told by my father. There was this photo of my father as a two year old wearing a top knitted by his mother. He would always say that she was very creative.

I have never seen my father talking about his mother without his eyes becoming moist. He lost her when he was perhaps still in school. I cannot really imagine how it might have been for him. She died in child birth. My father was fast asleep at home when this happened. In his sleep he dreamt of his mother. She was calling him. She said, “Mone (son), I have made Neyyappam (a sweet made of rice flour and jaggery) for you. Wake up now”. He woke up from his sleep only to hear his uncles, his mother’s brothers, whispering, “How are we going to tell this to the boy?” They didn’t have to; he knew the worst had happened. The baby was still born and she too drifted off soon, sadly for my father, his three younger brothers and three sisters, the eldest barely 13.

Many people who knew her have told me that she was very beautiful. I greedily ask a lot of questions about her to people who had the chance to know her. I still do, but now I have more questions to ask. My father died when I was 22 and never had the chance to know my husband or kids. I now ask, “How was my father when he was little?” I asked this question to an elderly ayah, who was with my father’s family. She had also stayed in my house for a month to help me take care of my new born daughter. While bathing my daughter, she would remember some incidents involving my father. She told me he was very naughty.

Now my kids have a lot of questions for me about their Appuppan (maternal grandfather). Memories are real treasures we pass on to the future generations…

Rinky was the cutest pup!

2010-06-08T22:17:00.009+05:30

“You know Amma, Rinky was the cutest pup”, my daughter broke her silence. We lay in her bed, remembering the stray pup who died in his sleep that evening in his favorite place—beneath our car.

Rinky’s mom was a stunner. She was black and lean and stood out among other stray dogs in the locality. This was her second litter. All the three pups in her first litter had died. These pups were born in an isolated outhouse in the residential layout. In the brood of seven, only two were black like the mom. The rest were in varying mix of brown and white. “You know Amma, their dad is that brown and white dog. You must have seen him”. I hadn’t, but thought she must be right.

As they grew older, some of them got more adventurous and ventured out to explore. Kids loved the pups. My daughter was inconsolable when one of them died under the Corporation's van. Soon the pups grew in size and became really chubby and adorable.

We warned the kids against playing with the stray pups, which they often ignored. I am not exactly that fond of dogs, and prefer to admire them from a distance and detested when the pups followed us in our post dinner walks. It was like they had adopted us rather than the other way around.

Soon their number was reduced to three—Rinky and Pinky, both brown, and Musky, who was black. They always slept under our car. When I woke up in the morning, I usually found them sleeping, all curled up. I loved that scene. They always ignored my protests and made it a point to run around me or jump at me as though they sensed my uneasiness. My daughter would say, “It’s only a puppy, why are you so scared?” These pups made friends with our neighbor’s ferocious Great Dane. We were worried that he might kill them, but they got along so well.

Two days back, we noticed that Rinky was not eating anything. His neck was swollen and he looked like he would die soon. He didn’t suffer much, he died the next day. I never thought I would ever miss a dog, especially some stray dog, but Rinky will be missed very much!

Growing vegetables in containers

2010-04-16T14:07:00.022+05:30

I guess everyone should experience the pure pleasure of seeing tiny seedlings emerging from the soil. But I should warn you, its addictive!

We do not have enough space for outdoor gardening, so my garden is limited to the terrace or balcony. I read on the Internet about the best practices to grow vegetables in containers and bottles we throw away. Actually almost everything came from waste. In the below image, you can see my mint plant growing in a used Coca Cola bottle!

I used kitchen waste for fertilizer and used sand and this waste to fill the pots. I also filled a large bucket with water and leaves, both dry and green we collected from around. These decayed leaves were also used as fertilizer. After a month this mix started smelling like cow dung! I diluted this to use for the plants.

In the images below you can see yard long beans and the beautiful white flowers of snake gourd. The best part of my gardening efforts was getting the kids interested. As soon as I return from office, they would say, "Come, let's water the plants!" They would tell me if anything notable happened. My son would say, "The cucumber has a new female flower, shall we hand fertilize it?" We did all that and also spent a lot of time, removing bugs and those tiny creatures troubling the plants.

This year, the harsh summer was so unkind to my plants, but many of them thrived. I am experimenting with grapes too. I managed to grow them from seeds. Here's a seedling below. Ladies finger seedlings are also doing well.

It's a wonderful learning experience. And I have really learned a lot from my experience. I am sure I will do a better job next time around.

When teachers settle their scores

2010-01-27T22:27:00.005+05:30

What if a teacher tries to settle scores with his helpless students? I am sure almost all of us have been punished by our teachers at least once during our school years. But a teacher settling scores is a totally different and shameful issue.

My experience does not actually involve me directly, but that does not make it any different. It’s about how my younger brother and his friend were thrashed mercilessly by their chemistry teacher when they were 12 year-olds. The teacher, who must have been in his early thirties entered their class and wrote chemistry equations on the board and asked one of them to solve it. Fortunately for him, the boys were weak in studies and he was sure that they were incapable of balancing the equations. Then he called the other boy to solve it. As he had foreseen, both of them were unable to solve the equation. He dragged the two boys outside the class so that everyone from other classes too could view his ‘performance’. He started thrashing the boys mercilessly in full view of other classes and when one of them fell, he kicked him. Later we came to know that he had told other teacher friends of his plans. One of them confessed to my father later.

His friend, a physics teacher, an old student himself, was taking class in eleventh standard. He stopped the class and told the students that there will be some fun in 9A and stood near the door to watch the “show”. When the period was over, the group of teachers comprising a young biology teacher and an English teacher went to see the bleeding and swollen legs of the boys and passed comments. Almost all the senior teachers pressurized my father, a teacher in the same school, to register a complaint. However, he refused saying that teachers have the right to punish their students.

It was only later that we came to know about the actual reason for the circus. The newly married teacher’s wife reportedly received a letter describing her husband’s colorful past. The teacher, for some reason thought it was these boys who did this and checked their notebooks for their handwriting and made plans to punish them for this. Later the real culprit was caught from his friends' circle itself. The actual culprit had taken his wife’s help in composing the anonymous letter. So this was a well planned affair, not a teacher’s reaction out of righteous anger. This was not an isolated incident. This teacher has beaten up these boys several times with vengeance for reasons such as "bad handwriting". They were beaten and humiliated in class for many days. This was pure scheming and revenge on helpless boys. I would have forgiven him had he questioned the boys upfront and then punished them if they were proven guilty.

When we were kids our parents and teachers didn’t believe in sparing the rod and spoiling us. I have myself got beatings from many teachers including my father. Being the naughty kid that I was, I had many bluish finger marks on my cheeks for proof. But I think my brother would have got the most number of beatings from my father. But then we know that our parents and teachers did care. There were many teachers who were apparently very sweet, but turned out to be the opposite. It is not the physical act of beating that hurts, but the feeling that we were wronged.

I have not met this Chemistry teacher after leaving the school. Wherever he is, he is still hated very much.

Story of a manager & hiring tips

2009-11-21T17:21:00.015+05:30

In any office we will find people like Mr. A who always try to avoid work. These guys sit at their desk from nine to six and that's about it. They generally don’t take ownership for their work. Give them a task; they will do it as though they are doing a great favour. Rarely, in case of emergencies if someone has to stretch, they are not ready.

Let’s see what Mr. A has been doing throughout the day in the office. He struggles to reach the office on time and then goes straight to the canteen for breakfast. Almost an hour later, he finally sits at his desk, logs into chat and starts chatting with his girl friend using his headphones. His manager has to call him again and again to get a reply because, he is so involved in some serious discussion with his girlfriend. In between he manages to do some work as well. He takes another long break and then comes back only to take another ‘looong’ break for lunch. He comes back, resumes chatting and work only to take another break to go out. That’s when the manager comes and gives this ‘emergency’ work to be completed the same day.

Manager says, “This is an emergency, we need to send this today. Mr. A replies matter of factedly, “We can’t do this today”. Manager asks, “why not?” ‘A’ replies, “I can finish only three-fourth by 6.00. The rest can be done tomorrow only”.

Fortunately the office also has hardworking guys like Mr. B who actually want to do their best. They are willing to take on more work, more responsibilities and also grow in that process. Mr.B steps in and says, “I will do it”. We have actually left out Mr. C, the official gossip monger. He always pretends to be busy and tries to get away with this by befriending the boss or through similar shortcuts. These are the politicians in the office. I have written about them in detail in another post. Do check that out.

Now the manager has two choices: insist that Mr.A stays back and completes the work or allow Mr.B to complete the work because Mr.C has claimed that he is busy with some work nobody is aware of. Usually the manager will put his foot down and ask Mr.A to finish the work. Asking Mr.C is out of question. Now Mr.A actually feels like a victim and complains, “This company has no ethics, no professionalism, look they made the work late”. Mr.C agrees eagerly. The funny part is these guys actually believe what they say!

If you are a manager, you must be a worried man. You really wish to sack Mr. A & C and want your team to be full of people like the hardworking Mr.B, isn't it? There is no way to get rid of ‘A’ or ‘C’ or even transfer them to other departments, especially if your office is small. You can’t even pray that theses guys will get some other job and leave, because they know better!

But all is not bad, before you praise the hard worker and complain about the others, think carefully, the hardworking guys don’t really need managers. You have a decent job as a manager because there are guys like ‘A' and ‘C’ to manage! If you are a manager, ‘A’ and ‘C’ are your actual employers, be grateful! Now you know what to keep in mind when you hire!

Why ‘inlaws & ‘outlaws’

2009-08-20T20:58:00.008+05:30

In laws are a hated lot. Ever wondered why? To find the answer, let’s look at the other relationships, which are much cherished by everyone—between parents and children! Why is the relationship so special? Well, it’s not bound by rules, but by love. But relationship with in laws is generally bound by rules, rarely by love, especially in country like India, where these rules are rigid.

Until your marriage, you do not come face to face with ‘rules’. With marriage, especially if you are staying with in laws, rules rule your world. Those who haven't lived with in laws for at least a year are not eligible to make a judgement here. With marriage, a girl dreams about creating her own cute little universe with her man and later with kids. Little do you realize what the reality will be! Suddenly, you find yourself being judged all the time. It’s a hard feeling. You never got that feeling when you were with parents.

Suddenly 'someone' decides or has an opinion on what you always considered personal—when you should have a baby, your baby’s name and sometimes even your baby does not belong to you. You suddenly get to know of your weaknesses and negative points, which were never in focus earlier. This is in contrst with a childhood much loved by parents. It takes time to get used to the feeling. You are never yourself. You are always trying to please someone or trying to rise to their standards. It will cause resentment and will take a toll on you and your relationships, especially if you are fiercely independent.

Where’s the little universe you were dreaming about? This could be the toughest part—the loss of a home. Your home is a beautiful place you could always come back after a hectic day and relax and be yourself. You find yourself longing for a real home and to be the real you. When you connect stress with the house you’ve got to go back to, it is no longer a ‘home’. You still have to go back there because you no longer have another place to go—your precious ones, your kids and husband are there, and they are much loved and belong there too. You have your duties to fulfill now. That’s life. It’s too short, you’ll never get to live that dream!

Daughter in law is also an in law. But I cannot comment on that part because, I am not ready to cross over to the other side of the bridge yet. Let me not be prejudiced. Parents in laws will have a lot to say too. But I would like to do my bit to change the concept of mother in law. Why shouldn’t a girl who will come to share my son’s life feel loved and wanted at our home?

Just like I want to be the best mom in the world, I would like to be the best mom and not mom in law to my son’s wife too. If I am not going to be one, I would rather not live to see my son’s marriage—I would love that he remembers me as a loving mom, and not someone who harassed his wife!

The swine flue scare

2009-08-14T22:39:00.003+05:30

A young teacher is Bangalore is believed to be the first casualty of swine fever in the city. Two of the schools remained closed this week while others preferred to be cautious. They explained to the children how grave the situation was and warned them not to go to school even if they had a mild cold or fever.

One of my daughter’s friends was down with cold and was absent from class for couple of days. The next day, almost the entire school heard rumours that the girl nearly had swine flu. My daughter came home and told me that her friend was very close to having swine flu. Well, that's kids spreading rumors. My brother said his boss who had just returned from Australia was diagnosed with swine flu. My husband said when he visited clients, they asked him to disinfect himself before entering the premises.

Last night I had stayed awake till 3.00 am to complete my work and started sneezing. I thought, oh, God, tomorrow everyone in the office will be scared to come near me. What more, people at home will also avoid me. I was alright in the morning. Now everyone treats a person with a common cold also to be an untouchable. We have cancelled movies and anything to do with crowded places.

Swine flu has hit the globe at the same time unlike other diseases. So far, most of the diseases like this were either in other Asian countries in Asia, Europe or the US. This is our first brush with a deadly disease. It may be a stranger, an unknown face, but it still seems too close. I just hope it just doesn’t get any worse.

Shivasamudra and the big banyan tree

2009-08-13T21:31:00.013+05:30

Shivasamudra waterfalls, about 125 kilometers from Bangalore, is simply awesome. The Cauvery river forms two waterfalls Gaganchukki and Bharachukki and looks majestic during the rainy season. Check out these images taken during our weekend trip. But make sure you don’t go there in the afternoon. Best time to visit would be in the evening when the sun is not so harsh. The day we visited was the inauguration of the waterfall festival.

We went to both Gaganchukki and Bharachukki to view the waterfalls. I had read in some websites, and my friends had also warned that there were no bathrooms or good hotels in Shivasamudra.

To my surprise, I saw a newly constructed bathroom and some temporary bathrooms made of metal sheets. I saw amused foreigners checking out these structures and clicking pictures. But the doors of the bathrooms were locked. Perhaps it was built for the VVIPs. While the VVIPs can relieve themselves, people like us will need to look for some cover.

I was tempted to wet my lips in the scorching sun, but decided against it. I decided it was a better idea to wait till evening and go to some hotel to visit the bathroom on our way back. But older people may not be able to wait for so long.

If only the authorities had provided basic amenities in such tourist spots instead of just focusing on celebrating such festivals. We also visited the 600-years old banyan tree on the way, the big banyan tree, which is another tourist attraction. You just can’t figure out where its main trunk is.

Racial violence in Australia, Europe, and in India

2009-06-17T21:07:00.005+05:30

We have been reading about racial violence against Indian students in Australia. Everyone has been reacting to the government’s inability to solve the problems of Indians abroad. Well, it’s not in Australia alone. When I traveled to Europe, I must say, strangers almost seemed hostile. If you know them personally, they are warm and friendly, otherwise they are cold.

When I was traveling in a train in London, a stranger blocked my way when I was trying to alight from the train. I was worried because the train would stop only for a short while. I had to take his hand off forcefully and run out of the train. He seemed angry and said, “F@#& off”. I wonder what infuriated him! Later, when I thought about it, I thought it must be my brown skin. People told me to not to venture out at night, because it wasn’t safe for us ‘brown skinned’ people. People seemed to link brown skin with terrorism. They also rudely refered to the so called brown skinned people as ‘Pakis’.

Forget about Europe, when I was traveling in a BTS bus in Bangalore, the lady conductor refused to stop the bus at my bus stop and said I should talk to her in the native tongue Kannada, to stop the bus. I have also had bad experience from people in north India, who jointly refer to all south Indians as ‘Madrasis’. The Shiv Sena bashing up north Indians is the other side of the coin.

There is no end to discrimination based on your colour, caste, nationality, state, district, and God knows what would come up next. We are all nomads, we don't really belong anywhere. If only people understood that!

The dirty face of office politics

2009-06-03T21:59:00.015+05:30

I am sure all of us would have, at some point, suffered coworkers, who would never give up trying to make our lives difficult. I can think of a couple of reasons - inferiority complex, jealousy, and inflated ego.

An ex-colleague of mine deleted my folder conaining all my work files, without leaving any trace. The back up did not include the recent files, leaving me to redo a lot of work. This is actually not that bad. A friend of mine was given wrong address and telephone numbers when she was travelling.

Another one, you can say, the less harmful one, is perhaps someone who makes it a point to inform the boss even if you sneeze in your cabin. Actually, some bosses seem to encourage that. In a company where I worked before, a colleaque was always complaining to the boss about me. I wondered if I should explain my side of the story. Then I decided against it. I thought, to have reached this level, the boss must be an intelligent person. Surely he has an idea about who is capable of what. I thought I should rather concentrate on work rather than give undue importance to some undeserving person. But, I must admit, it hasn't always beeen easy.

There is yet another category. They are the gossip mongers. They always give you information such as who the boss is currently seeing, a colleague getting a huge hike and all kinds of news. As a rule, they have no favourites. They simply latch on to anyone temporarily. The next moment they go back to the opposite camp to vomit all the juicy news.

Sometimes politics totally transforms the office atmosphere. It gets as bad as swimming in crocodile infested waters. Not only that you need to swim, you also need to avoid crocodiles. You'd better be good at both!

Power cuts make Bangaloreans star gazers

2009-05-05T21:34:00.004+05:30

The night sky is clear and the bright stars are twinkling and the full moon is a beauty. The cool breeze is heavenly. No airconditioner can ever replace it. Imagine sleeping under the stars! The night is best for star gazing.

We were planning to sleep in the terrace and were ready with blankets and pillows and mosquito coils! Kids are excited. "Tell us a story", they said. I look at the bright moon and tell the story of an alien kid from the moon who wanted to come to the earth and make friends with kids on earth. I made the story up by stealing bits and pieces from sci-fi movies. They fall asleep under the stars.

Not that we have suddenly become nature lovers, we are left with no other choice. In Bangalore, we face power cuts almost every night. Sometimes it lasts the whole night. Even with an inverter, power supply does not last whole night. Although the manufacturer promise 8 hours of power supply, the inverter has to puff and pant to come anywhere closer. To overcome that many homes use only one fan and all the members of the family sleep under the fan in the drawing room.

Well, we haven't bought an inverter yet. The recession is one major factor that makes anyone shy away from any major purchase. Let's see if we can do without one for some more time.

All is not not beautiful under the moon. Kids are fast aleep, but mosquitos are not. Their music gets louder and louder. A drop of water falls on my face. Rain! Bye bye moon, bye bye stars, we are back to civilization. Another sleepless night in the humid bedroom accompanied by live concert from mosquitoes!

If this continues, most of us Bangaloreans will become star gazers and poets. Blame it on climate change or global warming, I am almost certain we are starting our journey backwards from civilization.

Acute water shortage - water, the great leveller

2009-05-05T20:36:00.008+05:30

We never know the worth of water till the well is dry – wise words, perhaps too late!

Occupants of many apartments in Bangalore will vouch for that. Occupants in one of the apartment complexes recently shelled out Rs 100,000 for water. Reason – the bore wells dried out! Independent houses in Bangalore generally depend on tanker services during such a crisis. But apartments cannot do that. Fortunately a bore well owner agreed to sell water - for a good price! The increasing number of apartments and independent houses has made water shortage acute. Many apartment complexes, even those by well known builders are not equipped to handle such a crisis.

Things are no different in my home state, Kerala. A cousin’s house has a well, but the water is brown and salty and cannot be used for washing or drinking. The government supply of water was in abundance during the elections. Following the elections, there was no water supply for many days. This meant that people had to carry their clothes to other houses with wells for washing! Many had to make do with dirty water in bathrooms. They were too tired to fetch more water in autorickshaws.

For the assembly elections, a prominent party promised us water. No one actually believed in the party’s ideals, but voted for water - even the educated elite Bangaloreans did so. We laugh at poor people voting for one kilogram of rice, for a cycle or for a television set. But then we also vote for water supply or electricity for houses or tarred roads to our houses. Long live Democracy!

Pink slip - keep all communication channels open

2009-03-26T10:58:00.012+05:30

Pink slips are no longer news. It’s like, a neighbour’s just received one, a friend, a colleague, or a cousin has got the sack. It’s no longer something that happens to someone else. It could be just anyone, you or I. In a way it’s a great leveler—a pink slip scares everyone, right from the senior executives to the frontline staff. No one is immune.

A job is not just the loss of an income. A job is not just a job, it’s a career. It’s not simply the loss of a steady source of income. For a person it is his/her identity. Majority of the waking hours are spent at work. A lot of energy is spent on a project to nurture it. Family and entertainment are pushed to the back burner. And then without any notice, on a fine day, an HR executive calls for a meeting and simply puts it across, “We are sorry it hasn’t worked, we tried our best to retain you”. ID cards are returned, laptop handed over. It's like you are being stripped of your identity. The HR continues with its processes to clean up after you. Now there's nothing to show for any of your earlier efforts. Be good. You sure want your papers in order. You get sympathetic glances from the other cubicles. It’s not their turn yet! You ask someone to open the doors for you as you no longer have an identity card. And then you are out of there. The end.

Initial days are filled with hope. You’re sure you will be an asset somewhere. But then, nothing seems to be happening! Is there light at the end of this dark tunnel? None in sight, especially if you are a senior person. And, frankly, there’s no opportunity out there now. No one’s hiring. Your confidence takes a beating. It simply seems like you are in this tunnel forever.

Perhaps the best thing to do is to keep all channels of communication open. Hiding the fact would never help. You never know where help would come from. You might just be surprised!

Exams and stress

2009-02-27T23:05:00.005+05:30

My 12-year old son is busy preparing for his exams. Rather, we, his parents are busy preparing him for his exams. On one hand, the syllabus is tough. On the other hand, the portions for the final exams include almost all lessons.

Like some of the kids of his age, for my son too Maths is difficult. While I knew about the stress of exams, an incident made me understand the toll it has on kids.

Some days back, during his study time, my son came to me. His father was teaching him Maths. It was about 8pm and I was busy folding the clothes. There were other chores also to be done. He said, “Can I lie on your lap for a while?” I was lost in thoughts and casually said, “Let me finish this, I will take only two minutes”. He stood there waiting. I didn’t really pay much attention. Some time later his father called out to him, “You asked me for a five minutes break! Come back now”. That’s when I realized he was waiting for me to finish my work. His eyes filled and he was about to turn back.

Feeling guilty, I said he could continue his Maths work later. That is, whenever he felt he was ready. He lay on my lap for a while and then said, “Now I feel better. I was feeling so stressed. I think I will finish my work now”. He then went back to his work.

I am sure this is not an incident concerning just my son. This could be a slice of any kid's life. It’s not easy for parents either. But, it made me realize how important it is for us to understand the gravity of stress a student undergoes. I can only hope that every child would get the chance to bloom to his or her fullest without stress.

The variety entertainment called elections

2009-02-26T22:30:00.007+05:30

Elections are around the corner. Take a look at the streets and you will know that. There are huge hoardings put up on both sides of the road. We can see politicians with folded arms looking down at us from these illegal hoardings. I find this disgusting. Some of these simply block the traffic signals.

There are also huge structures erected across the road. These are certainly illegal. They look crude and are dangerous as well as they reduce visibility around the corners. These political parties should be punished for these illegal hoardings, which deface the city. Perhaps people should decide that they would never cast their so called precious vote for any party that erects such hoardings and throws promotional material all around.

The election season is not actually all that bad, it is fun time also. Really! Listen to how they act, what they say, and the blame game-the war of the words. It is variety entertainment!

Like you see in the photo on the right, politicians only smile from these hoardings. Life goes on as usual. Nothing changes and no one really cares!

I hope this time there will be negative voting. At least we can at least be honest with ourselves!

IT sleuths recover crores from Kannada actress’ residence

2009-02-11T22:47:00.008+05:30

Our IT sleuths prove they are worth their salt!

Our smart IT sleuths received information that a large amount of cash was being transported to the beautiful Kannada actress Radhika's Banashankari residence. Who said our intelligence system is no good? They haven’t read this news yet!

Two teams of the IT sleuths set up surveillance and waited near her house. Our anti-terrorist squad should be trained by these people! What planning and execution! Indians can burst with pride. Two teams! Now we know why they are unavailable for raiding corrupt politicians’ houses.

The teams notice Toyota Innova car entering the compound and four gunny sacks of currency notes were being removed and taken into the house. Straight out of a Bollywood movie! If you want to see dedication to work, here it is!

Newspapers as well as IT department have many questions. How she was able to gather about Rs 10 crores? Who gave that much amount of money? No one bribes actors for sure. Do actresses earn money by cheating? Do they waste public money? The IT department should know better.

Now take a U turn to the past.

Scene 2

This is about former Karnataka chief minister Kumaraswami. Times of India says - in 2004, before Kumaraswamy became a MLA and chief minister, his family wealth was Rs 3.67 crore. By which time he had ruled as chief minister for 20 months, it rose to around Rs 52 crore. Now, in December 2008, little over a year after he lost power, the family wealth has reduced to Rs 40 crore.

I guess our IT sleuths have not read this yet. Otherwise, they are not people who would like to bask in the glory of a big haul at an actress’ house. They must be lying in wait wearing war paint at another actress’ residence. Cheers to them!

Moral policing on Valentine’s Day

2009-02-05T20:21:00.005+05:30

Well, the self proclaimed moral police have already warned youngsters planning to celebrate the day to abstain from it. According to them it is Christian. How about Xmas then? Many of the Hindus celebrate Xmas. Now Karnataka’s BJP government has made it clear that they are not for the safety of the people but for ensuring they are “morally correct”.

We know what to expect on Valentine’s Day this year. The moral police are going to beat up young couples. Don’t be surprised if you hear that girls were molested or that people were stripped and paraded. Our country is moving towards that shame. Now its citizens have to celebrate in fear of the so called politicians. Let the CM make the state a place where people can live with out fear. However, it is far from the present situation, where the fence itself eats the crops (a phrase borrowed from Malayalam).

Is there a solution to this? The only way is to nip the tendency in the bud. Once these people know that they will be punished, they will not opt for this. Considering the pent up anger of the young population, I am sure these moral police will be at the receiving end this time.

Is this the freedom our ancestors fought for? I remember the song below, which we sang in school. Perhaps Tagore knew where “free” India was headed.

“Where the mind is without fear and the head is held high;
....................................................................................................
Where the clear stream of reason has not lost its way into the dreary desert sand of dead habit;

Where the mind is led forward by Thee to ever-widening thought and action -

Into that heaven of freedom, my father, let my country awake.”

Pub culture will not be allowed in Bangalore, says CM

2009-01-29T21:15:00.002+05:30

Karnataka chief minister (CM) says his government will not allow pub culture in Bangalore. He says it is against Indian culture. Drink at home, says CM. So does the Rajasthan CM. This is the greatest joke of the century. When did these people become the guardians of morality in India? So what is the chief minister’s role? The CM has to uphold the culture of India, which seems to be his main duty. They don’t even seem to know what culture is. Culture is giving respect to others. Does the so called Indian culture allow violence against women? He says it's ok to drink at home. Is he saying that parents and children drinking at home is Indian culture?

The government’s next move will be to say that women should not work as they had not done so before. That’s also westernization. They would soon stop couples in motorbikes to prevent women from traveling with “unrelated” men. This might also be against the so called Indian culture. They will be pushed from their bikes and beaten. You might soon get to see these on television. I am sure they would also love to bring a dress code like the Taliban. Now you know where we are headed. The Indian Taliban will say the rhetoric, “they are like our sisters, we only want to protect them.”

I remember an incident, where the Karnataka police showed their sense of duty. I was in the park with my husband and son, who was a toddler then. There was another couple in a bench on the opposite side. The police came and asked them to get into the police jeep. They pleaded with the police saying they were only talking. But the police did not budge. It was barely 6 pm. We were spared because the child was proof of our marriage!

Is this part of a policeman’s duty? There is so much for them to do, rather they do not do. Bangalore would be a much better place if they concentrated on their duty instead of looking at something absolutely needless. May be their job is not as interesting as chasing women.

But then what choice do we have? Well, keep yourself glued to the telly as the drama unfolds. We can only hope it wont be us!

Moral policing in Mangalore pub

2009-01-28T21:32:00.003+05:30

It was a disturbing sight—girls frantically running out of the pub chased by the self proclaimed moral police. They were held by their hair and beaten. The videos were being shown repeatedly.

I was thinking about the kind of men who would treat a woman like that. A normal person cannot do that, even in the case of an inflated sense of morality. They were perhaps eying girls who wear modern dresses and behave in a way they cannot digest. They would have felt that these girls were out of their “reach”. The attack was a way of being superior to them. It gave them a false sense of superiority.

Talking about morality, there exist men who would visit whorehouses at night and become moral police during the day. Look at the men arrested. They look like seasoned criminals, who wouldn’t lose an opportunity to molest a woman.

Indian constitution does not have any clauses differentiating moral codes for men and women. According to our moral police, men can go to pub, wear shots, and behave in any way they want. This is also westernization. Why are they not policing them?

And what exactly is morality and when did morality surface? The current ideal of Bhartiya naari (Indian woman) is perhaps a recent one. A couple of generations back, women belonging to lower castes in my home state were not allowed to cover their upper body. Even if they covered they were expected to remove them when an upper caste man came across.

What happened to the people who molested a newly wed on New Year’s eve in Delhi? Perhaps it is forgotten. The culprits should ideally receive punishment, which will deter anyone planning to follow their footsteps. The incident should not be politicized. Instead each of the accused should be tried and punished. Relating them to any party simply dilutes the crime. The act should be seen as molestation. Nothing less nothing more. Remember, such incidents dont always happen to others.

Corporate fraud

2009-01-19T16:00:00.005+05:30

I have come across many people who could empathise with Ramalinga Raju, ex-Chairman of Satyam. Guess why? They felt they were also in one way or the other treading the same path. Take the example of a sales person. In his own way, he routinely inflated his monthly sales figures. He often changed the dates to accommodate sales to the particular month. He often got into trouble, but managed to get away as his figures were small and could be written off easily. This is the case of an entry level salesman, an insignificant cog in the wheel!

How about a senior manager in a top company? He literally went against company policies to meet the target by backdating and fudging accounts. If caught, he would be in a soup. Many of his teammates are aware of these wrong doings. However, they are wary of discussing this with him as he was a senior person. He is confident that he can pull it off. He also feels it is okay to do such things as meeting the target was the most important thing. However, he doesn’t realize or refuses to understand that this is fraud. Figures are more important to him. Even his boss wanted “figures”. Did his boss expect his manager to say he couldn’t meet the target? No way. It’s not for nothing, people say, “by hook or crook”. Why would people coin such terms if they don’t mean it? “Anything is fair in love and war.” Is the corporate situation any less than war? Of course, no one is a thief until he is caught!

Jesus said, “Let anyone among you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone”. So, there we are!

Economic recession, a story

2009-01-09T22:48:00.009+05:30

Scene: An IT company in Bangalore
July 2008
News: The company’s quarterly results are out and the projected revenue for the next quarter is quite a dream.
An employee calls the admin department, “I need two pencils. Could you please send it to my table?” “It will be there in 10 minutes”, replies the lady in the admin department. The items reach her table in less than 10 minutes.
Sept 2008
News: Fall of Lehman Brothers!
The employee calls the admin department, “I need two pencils. Could you please send it to my table?” She gets the reply, “Please come and meet me”. She goes to the department. The admin personnel says, “Please fill in a requisition form, sign and then take a pencil”. “But I need two, says the employee”. “Sorry, we can give you only one. We are trying to cut costs you know”.
November 2008
News: Global recession hits India
The employee goes to the admin department, fills the form for a pencil. The admin personnel says, “This pencil is for the whole team”. “wha…t?” “I hope you have read the internal circular about reducing overheads”. “Yeah”. “Anyways, I can’t understand what you want to write”
December 2008
News: Recession expected to worsen
The employee goes to the admin department, fills the form for a pencil. “The team needs a pencil”, said she. “Sorry, you will have to bring your own pencils. You don’t have any project. What do you want to write anyway?”
January 2009
News: An IT company chairman quits over inflated revenue; company in tatters.
The employee goes to the admin department and pulls out a box of pencils hands it over to the admin personnel and says, “Here, in case you need it, I just read an internal circular asking employees to contribute to help save the company”.

Satyam - in the line of fire

2009-01-08T21:02:00.006+05:30

No one commits a crime thinking that he will be caught. Satyam CEO Ramalinga Raju would never have thought about writing to his colleagues about “riding the tiger”. Depending on the nature and gravity of the crime, you know clearly what the consequences will be. When you are feeding a tiger, you know it will grow into a ferocious carnivore that can eat you. But you think you can handle it until you are riding it to protect yourself.

This is the time, the criminal feels the heat. Finally the moment he had never even seen in his nightmares unfolds right in front of him. People point fingers at him. This is the moment for standing up and owning up about the tiger.

I was witness to a different kind of corporate drama in the beginning of my career. The manager would talk about major projects coming our way and how the company would expand and would move into a new campus. The notice boards were full of highly inflated figures. In reality, the company was struggling to even pay the salary. The managers were instructed to talk to the employees this way.

The Satyam episode could simply be the tip of the iceberg. There could also be strong undercurrents under the seemingly calm surface. Seeing its plight, many may be desperately trying to prevent the skeletons from tumbling down. There’s perhaps nothing much to do but wait and watch for the fireworks.

New Year 2009

2008-12-30T21:36:00.005+05:30

New Year is here again. 2008 will be past and soon 2009 will be here.

We all have our share of good and bad things that happened in 2008 and we are all eagerly looking forward to the New Year with great hopes.

The year 2008 will always be remembered for the Mumbai terrorist attacks. Now as the New Year begins, India is into intense discussions with Pakistan on how to wipe out terrorism right from its roots.

On the global front, the “great” economic recession happened casting its dark shadow over the whole world. We are still in its dark shadow waiting desperately for it to move away from our horizon. The year 2009 will be crucial in this respect. The whole world is looking up to Obama to see how the new president of the US is planning to turn around the economy.

What was the best thing to happen to me in 2008? Well, the authorities decided to fill up the craters on the roads, which were the trademark of the Airport road. I have personally visited the depths of one of these craters. What do I look forward to in 2009? I hope the street light along the road will open their eyes, taking us back from the time when stars and the moon guided travelers.

I guess Bangalore has a one-hour relaxation on late night parties although it does not seem to be good idea to be on the road at that time. I am sure people haven’t forgotten how an unruly crowd molested a newly wed in front of a hotel in Delhi after a party. Both censored and uncensored versions of the incident did their rounds in the media, adding injury to the insult. Looks like the police will be really busy this New Year.

Indo-Pak war

2008-12-25T22:06:00.002+05:30

Any discussion on Indo-Pak war brings to my mind yellowish old newspapers covering the windows of our quarters in the Sainik School campus. I was not even born at the time of the 1971 war, but the windows covered with old newspapers always reminded us of the war. The aerial view of the lit up campus would have given an impression of a defence establishment. Our parents explained that the windows were covered to avoid air attacks. Even after several rounds of maintenance work, the newspapers on the windows remained.

Among war stories, we have also heard a lot of stories about the First World War, in which some of our relatives also took part. They were in the French army. I have heard many sad stories about their children orphaned by the war after the French hospital was attacked.

So far, an India-Pak war may have been fought by soldiers somewhere far away. Most of us only read in newspapers about our soldiers dying in the border. What would be the magnitude of another war between the two countries? Can we imagine covering up our windows and living in fear of air attacks?

Lack luster Christmas for Bangalore sans Santa

2008-12-24T21:38:00.007+05:30

Looks like Bangalore will have a really quiet Christmas this year. There is no festival spirit on the occasion this year. Even though we don’t celebrate Christmas, we could simply feel it in the air. This time we never realized it was Christmas but for the holiday. It just felt like another holiday on the calendar, sans cheer. I didn’t even see stars lit outside houses.

Blame it on the terrorist attacks in Mumbai or the economic slowdown, it feels really empty. People simply don’t seem to be in a mood to celebrate. Even though malls have additional security, people generally seem to want to avoid crowded places. The same goes with cinema theatres.

Some people are even worried about going to churches. It’s like any place could be the next target. What is confusing me is that this is not the first time that India has witnessed violence. It has happened many times before. But never have people reacted this way.

It could be that people are unable to digest the fact that a handful of people from a neighbouring country could simply walk in and cause terror attacks of this magnitude. It could also be that people realized that terrorism can affect all classes. It is no longer something that affected local markets frequented by the lower and middle classes.

According to newspapers, many hotels have got rid of Santa as they don’t feel like celebrating. They also said that underpaid Santa was also not willing to spread cheer. We will miss Santa this year!

The story about Lord Ram and the frog

2008-12-21T00:30:00.005+05:30

I was really touched by this short, I must say very short story related to Ramayana about Lord Ram and a frog. Ram and his brother Lakshman reached a stream and were thirsty. They went towards the stream to quench their thirst. Ram struck his arrow into the ground near the stream and went to drink water. When Ram was back, he pulled out the arrow from the ground. He was astonished to find blood on the tip of his arrow. He looked down and saw a small frog. His arrow had pierced the frog, pinning it to the ground. Ram was sad. He asked the frog, “Why didn’t you cry out when the arrow pierced you?” The frog replied, “Whenever someone tries to harm me I cry out, “Ram, save me! When Ram himself pierces me with his arrow to whom can I cry out for help?”

The story has a deeper meaning into it. What could be worse? It always brings to my mind little children abused by adults. They are so innocent and trusting and they somehow think adults will protect them, especially their parents. In India we always read about parents killing the children as part of a mass suicide. Newspapers provided gory details of a mother strangling her 5-year-old daughter before committing suicide. There is another mother who threw her little ones into the river. I remember a spine chilling account by a railway engine driver, who saw a mother pushing her struggling little children in front of the train. He witnessed the helplessness and fear in the eyes of those little children who were crushed under the train.

My children were disturbed by such detailed accounts in newspapers. They asked, “Why do parents kill their children?” I said, “Parents, especially mothers think of a child as an extension of themselves. May be they think their children will suffer after their death”. But then there is no justification for taking an innocent child’s life. My son said, “Even if the parents want to die, why can’t they just let the children live. They will live some how.” I realized that children were following up with such incidents in newspapers. They are simply unable to digest the idea of parents killing their own children.

While parents are adults and make the decision themselves, the hapless children have no one to turn for help when parents turn attackers. Their little lives get put out by the same hands that nurtured them. For those children who survive, it will be a trauma that lasts a lifetime.

Forgive, but never forget rudeness

2008-12-16T19:42:00.006+05:30

Just like kindness touches our hearts, rudeness also affects us, though we would like to be immune. For some people rudeness is second nature, for some it is just exploiting another person’s helplessness or taking advantage of their position.

All of us would have come across rude bus conductors, auto rickshaw drivers and policemen in our day-to-day lives. We may also end up with rude neighbours. I thank my stars for my wonderful neighbours. They are such great friends. I wonder what makes people behave rudely. Sure, they can attribute it to extreme stress. But that does not excuse irrational behaviour.

Sometimes I feel tempted to return in the same coin. But then I stop myself thinking I shouldn't stoop so low. I am sure all of us would have at some point of time wondered why some people can’t be civil. What I have learned is that such people can never change themselves. And surely we do not want to experience that again. So the best thing would be to leave them alone. But if they happen to be your relatives or colleagues, it is hard to avoid them.

A rude act can continue to burn you. It simply churns out hatred. I still remember how some people were rude to me in my childhood. It’s so hard for me to forget or forgive. I believe we should forgive them, but never, never forget the experience. You don’t want to be stabbed in the same place again.

A polite word or smile does spread cheer. It’s pure happiness. You simply cannot measure it. The fragrance lingers in your soul. I guess there is a brighter side to rudeness. It makes us cherish the happiness and warmth of politeness and makes us think twice before being rude to others. Remember, you can never take back an unkind word.

Management lessons - learned and unlearned

2008-12-13T15:06:00.000+05:30

We learn and unlearn a lot with each organization we leave behind. No one ever gets to learn these management lessons in the IIMs.

Keep your eyes and ears open. It’s not a good idea to be the last person to know that your section is closing down. Believe me, gossips are good for health.
Nobody is indispensable, not even the boss.
Know that boss is always right. He likes it that way. No point in arguing with him. It’s like arguing with a 10-year-old.
Don’t ask, “Why are you only asking me about my late comings? Why aren’t you talking about me staying back later than office hours, and many other things I go out of the way to do?” Believe me, office clock starts at 9.00 am and stops at 6.00 pm and works only week days.
Is there a dumb boss preventing your growth? It’s time to quit. Most companies are management-friendly. They might prefer the dumb manager over the smart employee. Management does not really want brilliant employees. Too smart employees may be difficult to handle as they don’t easily swallow the management’s ideas.
Anything you do out of the way soon becomes part of your duty.
If your manager scolds you, put on a blank look on your face. That would deprive him of any sadistic pleasure.
Not doing well at the current job? Don’t feel dejected. Everyone has their own inherent qualities. Your may not be suitable for this job. Polar bears are not for Rajasthan. A situation of mismatch in requirement here. There is an employer looking for these qualities and has lots of money to spare too. You only have to find him.
Be honest. Employers can simply feel it. Not even harmless things like faking fever. Earn their trust.
Know your rights. Don’t allow yourself to be taken for a ride. Complain. Make yourself heard. Crying child gets milk. When you have to prove a point, don’t lose your temper. You will lose your cause too. Simply pretend to be angry. That helps.

Protecting India from terrorism

2008-12-11T19:30:00.001+05:30

The question here is not who will bell the cat, but how can we bell the cat. Terrorism sure needs to be destroyed from its roots, which are of course is in Pakistan. Many people who spoke to the media during the Mumbai attacks mentioned “War”. It may sound good if it is just an empty threat to Pakistan. If it helps frighten Pakistan president Asif Ali Zardari, fine. More than that, I am not too sure. Read any literature on war, no one has really benefited. Do we really want to destroy that country? If we have to fight Pakistan to destroy the terrorists, it’s like burning down a house to kill the rats.

There must be other ways to kill the rats. Pakistan surely did all it can to initiate, support, and groom terrorism. Then it grew out of control. Even if he wishes to, Zardari does not seem to have any power to put an end to terrorism. He has no teeth to bite. He does not even seem to have the strength to bark. He may be under threat. From the history of Pakistan we know what has happened of all rulers. Surely he knows their might and cannot displease them even at the cost of incurring the wrath of other countries.

What choice does India really have now? The only option may be to get the support of other powerful nations, which can push Zardari into doing something. That too very soon, while others may still be ready to help. US support sure has shaken Zardari. Banning some terrorist outfit may not help at all. They will soon change the name. What’s there in a name after all?

While India may be helpless about tackling the terrorists in Pak, it sure can do a lot in its own soil. Terrorists are able to infiltrate only because of security lapses. Seal all loopholes! Do not allow the government take the focus away from their inefficiency by blaming Pakistan. All of this again boils down to having a strong government in India. A government whose priority is the security of the nation, rather than the security of their own chair, is the need of the hour.

A new political party and its future

2008-12-10T21:03:00.000+05:30

Everyone has their own idea of what an ideal political party should be. The idea of forming such a party with support from like-minded people has crossed many minds. Sounds good. Of course, I too would like to support a good cause.

Power corrupts man
Absolute power corrupts absolutely!

Many of the existing political parties started off like this -- There was a situation, which needed repair. People joined hands to form a political union, which helped them overcome it. Time passed and party saw several leaders. By then, the situation that necessitated the party no longer existed. The urgency was gone. The ideals, which the party stood for perhaps was no longer relevant. People tend to stick to rules and policies, without realizing they too need to adapt to new needs posed by the new situations. The party now becomes ineffective. Absence of any change makes it stale. It becomes just another party.

Founders of many of the existing partners may be turning in their graves, unable to contain what has happened of their parties. Ever wondered what the founders would tell their parties’ new leaders? Food for thought!

How much time would a new party take to reach this stage? While a new party can be useful in the short term, would people who form a party look at its long term implications also? Form a new party or a union if only it will not be adding to the long list of brain-dead political parties.

Bollywood advocates black bands

2008-12-09T21:50:00.000+05:30

Our stars on earth are wearing black bands to express their solidarity. They want all Indians to wear black bands too. People can wear black bands and feel that they have done something for their fellow beings and the country. People can light candles too. Is that all India needs now?

With due respect to our Bollywood stars, why do media want “sound” bytes from the stars? Our stars are so good at their work. We really enjoy watching their movies. There it ends. There are very few Bollywood stars who have made any significant contribution to the society, other than wearing bands. If they are ready to take it further from there and try and do something meaningful for the society, hats off to them.

Media should be trying to do something meaningful, such as talking to people who can really make a difference. What’s the next step? What can we do to prevent terrorist attacks? How can we be better prepared? How can we help the victims? Media does have a higher responsibility than trying to snatch away their share of the celebrities’ limelight.

I hope media will stop regurgitating the clichéd “resilience of Mumbai”. They did move on, and quite remarkably. Should they be allowed to be hit just because they bounce back? We have in us the spirit to fight against all odds till the last breath. Even when the limbs of a human being are cut off, he would still try to crawl, until there is the last trace of life in him. It does not mean he should be subjected to such horrors repeatedly, until he cannot go on.

There are many lesser mortals who have braved the terrorists to help others. What about the hotel staff and many others? Media can play an important role by not letting the government forget them.

There is absolutely no reason for Muslims to feel others will suspect them or blame them for belonging to the religion. No one would ever say so. It was an attack on Indians, not any community. All fingers were pointed at the government for its inability to act.

Vote "only" for an eligible candidate

2008-12-08T20:41:00.000+05:30

Come elections, the media comes alive with recommendations for the citizens to exercise their highly acclaimed “right to vote”. Celebrities and politicians make the citizens understand that it is a sin to abstain from voting. This is the only way we can participate in democracy. The only way to ensure we have a say in what’s going on in our country. Through our representatives, we rule our country. “By the people, for the people, of the people”. This is nothing short of heaven.

Wake up from the dream! Recollect your experience at the last elections. This is a sample—my experience. We live in a residential layout. We didn’t have water supply. We had tankers supplying water. People in the layout approached the councillor for help. Nothing happened. Later, someone informed us that this person owned many tanker lorries supplying water. Providing regular water supply would of course affect his business.

Another politician promised water. There was an election, I don’t recollect which one (I am not so politics savvy), but he was elected. But no water again. He said, “You didn’t vote for me. I won because of votes by the other layout”. So water flowed in that direction. How did he know for whom we had voted? I thought voting was a confidential affair.

Then came the main elections. We want water! I looked at the list of candidates in our constituency. I thought no one was worth my vote. Then someone said, “The…candidate will give us water”. Of course I had to vote for someone. At the polling booth their representatives were scanning the people who turned up for voting. Can we demand that parties produce candidates who are worth our votes? Is there a way citizens can turn down unworthy candidates?

There needs to be an option where citizens can vote to disqualify a candidate. How about an option to bar the party from next elections if its candidate was disqualified? Wistful thinking! This might perhaps make parties choose a worthy representative. We should not be happy choosing A, B, C or D. If the answer is “None of the above”, that option should also be provided. WE have a duty towards our country. That’s not simply staining our finger.

Politicians want them all

2008-12-07T22:25:00.000+05:30

A former prime minister recently registered his anger against the public outcry against politicians. He wanted to know how the country could go forward without politicians. He said politicians were indispensable for the public, who perhaps failed to understand that.

Following the recent terrorist attack on Mumbai, almost every section of the society joined hands in blaming the politicians. Some of the politicians demanded additional security for themselves. An average Indian has many questions to ask. A farmer is indispensable to our country. He sows and reaps the grains that reach our dining table. A bank clerk is indispensable, so is a school teacher. How about the traffic policeman, who braves the scorching sun and freezing winter without adequate protection? How about the army personnel guarding our borders?

If they are indispensable, what makes a politician’s life more important? Why do they consider themselves more eligible for security, which is not provided to the common man? Is it because they are “common”? From whom should they be protected? How much money is actually lost from the exchequer towards security? Do all of them require such high levels of security? Politicians are more equal I guess!

Which politician would be willing to face the enemy forces in a war? Would they order a war if they had to? Would a transport minister be willing to travel in his own fleet of buses? Would he travel by these buses to work every day? If so, he can complain about people using private transport. Would an education minister send his children to vernacular government schools?

The army and police forces are ready to face any danger as part of their duty. But should they necessarily die? Aren’t they human? Don’t they have hopes and dreams like others? They are also husbands, brothers and sons like the others. A precious life should be scarified if only it is absolutely necessary.

Had intelligence done their duty, many lives could have been saved. Politicians have the power to tighten the strings. But what is top priority for them? Winning brownie points for next elections? Is it unfair to demand that politicians give back at least a small percentage of what they take from the common man?

Little ones swear

2008-12-04T21:09:00.000+05:30

I had an appointment with the kids' teacher. When I reached the school, kids had just starting going outside the gate. I saw two little girls chatting animatedly. Oh so cute, I thought. They were about 6-years old and had tied their hair in cute little pig tails. When we were closer, I heard what one of the kids just said. She said, "I asked her to f#*k off". I couldn't believe my ears. I looked at my husband in disbelief. "Did you hear that?", I asked. "I cant believe this", I said, " I am sure the kids dont really know what that's supposed to mean!".

Well, my worst experience with kids came in London, where I had been for the book fair. There was a 12 year old boy in the train. He was chatting away on his mobile. He was talking rather loudly for attention. He said, "I am sitting in this f#*king train with some Indian black d#*&s. My jaws dropped. The Indian boys in my team looked at each other. The English gentleman sitting next to us pretended to be deaf. So did the others in the train, while the kid continued with his conversation.

Call it generation gap or lack of descipline, perhaps kids will never stop giving us such surprises.

When thieves raided neighbour’s kitchen

2008-12-03T22:03:00.000+05:30

A bunch of thieves broke into our neighbour’s house at midnight. The funny part was that they were all dressed in red underwear. I wondered how they planned the “operation”. Wonder why they chose the outfit!

The couple heard noises at the back door and were shocked to find the thieves in their kitchen. They screamed. Not to mention it scared the thieves. They jumped over the wall of the layout and disappeared into the dark night.

So far, it seems they did the right thing. Anyone would have done the same. It must have been a terrifying experience.

However, the couple did not inform the neighbours or the police. They thought the thieves got away and that there was no point in disturbing the neighbours. The police had a different story to tell next morning.

The thieves did not return to their homes after escaping from their house. They went to another house that night. They threatened the elderly couple in that house and looted the house. They stuffed all the stolen items into a Maruthi van waiting on the road and then took off. They didn’t harm the couple though.

The police said a complaint from them would have alerted the police, who could have easily caught the thieves. Do we realize how our actions can affect others?

Children ask about terrorism

2008-12-03T20:44:00.000+05:30

Ever wondered what children would ask about terrorism?
I was surprised at what kids actually wanted to know.
There is no downplaying terrorism. My 12-year-old son and 9-year-old daughter know more about terrorist attacks than any adult in the family. Blame it on media overdose. However, they didn’t seem to be agitated. Or so I thought so until my son asked, "Which profession is not dangerous?" I thought I should be tactful here.

I said, "Look, both your uncle and aunt are army officers. Isn't that a good profession?". Of course they didn't buy it. They asked, “Who are those people who attacked Mumbai?” and exclaimed, “Oh, they are so young!”
I said, “They are terrorists. They attack innocent people.”

Son said, "It's sooo sad.. that two-year-old boy...he lost his parents...sooo sad."
“Why do they do that?”
I try to explain. “Many of them are people, who are deprived in many ways. It is easy for bad people to influence them into doing bad things.”
“What do they do then?”
I said, “They spread terror through such attacks.”
They asked, “And then?”
I don’t have an answer.
Do we?